In this our fourthworld, when a child cries, either its wet, or has tummy or other trouble. The onus is on the parent to listen to that child, because children rarely cry for no reason. If the wailing persists, and after carefully evaluating that nothing is really wrong with the child, a parent can safely place a dummy in the child's mouth and let the child suck on the dummy to quieten down, till the child sleeps. Dummies can take the form of a treat, or a promise to do as the child demands. Once the child receives that dummy, treat or promise, the wailing stops. The parent is happy that the child has stopped fretting, and the child feels empowered that the parent has backed down to its wailing. Of course the parent knows that a dummy, treat or promise is really a sugar coated 'lie' but the child greedily accepts whatever is offered because they feel they control the parent and they can get the parent to do whatever they want.
Next time you are faced with such a situation, look at it carefully. Children ask for what they think they want, and sometimes risk leg and limb to make a point, which leg and limb someone else has to pay for to fix. When you give these children what they wail for, they do not appreciate what they get, because they do not know if it is what they truly wanted in the first place. Chances are, they wail in frustration because they cannot get something they thought they could easily get, or a toy they voluntarily cast away because they do not have the capacity to be satisfied with what they have. So now, they go all out to demand what they think they want, and the senseless time-wasting and physically draining debacle ensues, if you, the parent take such a child seriously. Rather than go to war with such a child, first and foremost, it is important to remember that this is a child you are dealing with and most of the time, children are afraid. Therefore, play along, and make the child feel they have your attention. Then, to really get them to stop the tantrums, play the idiot and feed their ego so that they have something to boast about. Children are predictable and, they do the same thing again and again so you really have to be patient. The beautiful thing about children is that they soon forget and go after new toys, so patience pays. Just remember, these children did not make themselves into who they are - greed for all toys and trinkets did.
Next time you are faced with such a situation, look at it carefully. Children ask for what they think they want, and sometimes risk leg and limb to make a point, which leg and limb someone else has to pay for to fix. When you give these children what they wail for, they do not appreciate what they get, because they do not know if it is what they truly wanted in the first place. Chances are, they wail in frustration because they cannot get something they thought they could easily get, or a toy they voluntarily cast away because they do not have the capacity to be satisfied with what they have. So now, they go all out to demand what they think they want, and the senseless time-wasting and physically draining debacle ensues, if you, the parent take such a child seriously. Rather than go to war with such a child, first and foremost, it is important to remember that this is a child you are dealing with and most of the time, children are afraid. Therefore, play along, and make the child feel they have your attention. Then, to really get them to stop the tantrums, play the idiot and feed their ego so that they have something to boast about. Children are predictable and, they do the same thing again and again so you really have to be patient. The beautiful thing about children is that they soon forget and go after new toys, so patience pays. Just remember, these children did not make themselves into who they are - greed for all toys and trinkets did.
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